Delete this people
If the previous article was about a neutral and positive environment that can help you and contribute to your development, then here I will talk about them — toxic vampire characters — people who should not be among your loved ones, so that you can feel good, feel harmony and enjoy life.
So, let's go.
Those you cannot trust. With them you just cannot say or do anything superfluous, because they do not know how to store any secrets. All you private life will become public in the most contorted poses, words and circumstances. And these toxic people will try very hard to make your existence as uncomfortable as possible. And they will do it with a nice sweet face and appropriate music ost.
Those to whom you are «uncomfortable». They abruptly stop picking up the phone when you need their help and change the topic of the conversation when you want to share something personal, joyful or sore. Such ignoring in relations is not the norm, it makes you feel very inappropriate "with your little world," and in the future this form of behavior will lead to a general mistrust and misunderstanding in the relationship. If you notice something similar in close interrelations — ask yourself a question, and what in fact is happening.
Those who hate or insult you. Unwanted advice, ambiguous remarks, questions that put you in an embarrassing situation (especially pronounced publicly) indicate that it would be nice for you to wonder: for what purpose does a person do all this? Obviously - not to make you feel better. The Insults, falsifications, ridicule, dissolving gossip about you and hypocrisy — all this indicate a process where inadequacy and drama are at the center of what is happening, not friendship and common human values. You ALWAYS can determine: it was an evil poisoned critic, or a friendly advice from a person who really loves you. And yes... If it seems to you that "something is clearly not right" — in most cases it does not seem to you.
Those who depreciate you. If person told that you are stupid, mediocre, unremarkable, do not hold out to some non-existent ideal, constantly compare you to someone not in your favor, insert phrases like «nothing special, everyone knows how to do the same» etc — you need to take a closer look at the person from whom this toxic reaction flows. In such way the depreciating person tries to shake your self-esteem and multiply by zero the sprouts of your inspiration and creative energy. And assert himself at your expense, by the way.
Those who sow doubt in your power. «You cannot», «You will not succeed», «What's the usefulness of this ?!». Wait a minute! If you do not build a time machine in the forest of Siberia, which from 2018 will transfer you in 1405, and at the same time — and Mars with Venus cast, and all this you do in a foil cap, dancing a Mexican shaman dance — if you do not do it all foolishness — you should not receive such a feedback from people from your environment. But, if you still get it - take a look at the commentator. Perhaps it is his problems with motivation, self-realization and internal resources and by the «extinguishing» you he wants to pacify the moaning of his rotting ego.
The one who envies you. If there is someone next to you who envies you (by black, white, gray, crimson envy) — you need to figure out: do you really need such a biomass nearby? Because envy is a very specific feeling that makes people at the most inappropriate and unexpected moment show their most vicious and toxic qualities in your direction. More details about what envy is, what its mechanism looks like, who most often envies, how to recognize envy and how to use it in their favor, I wrote here.
The one who steals your ideas. The plagiarist is a parasite. Which caters at your expense his mediocrity and lack of talent. This person came to pick up, and when you catch him by hand, he makes innocent eyes and mumbles that "just inspired." I advise you to immediately isolate yourself from such personalities, especially if your sphere of activity directly depends on ideas and inspiration. Also in this situation, minimal legal education will be very useful — you will know how to protect your material and non-material rights from such characters.
If we sum up: this post is about personal boundaries.
Anyone who is trying to steal your time, attention, strength and resources, using any manipulative toxic techniques, violates your personal boundaries. None of the above characters cannot get strength, vitality and love by any normal methods. But all of them want this love, attention to themselves and confirmation of the meaning of their existence from the side of the world. Their «I am» works with very large failures so if you find something similar in your environment, think about — do you need this disease history nearby.
The list of toxic characters in the article is not exhausted only by the forms of behavior described above. You can identify what causes personal discomfort to you in your environment and badly affects your mental state and creative energy.
I wish to you be surrounded by those people who are necessary for your well-being, emotional recovery, sense of happiness and harmony.
Have a nice day. And to someone — have a BAD day, because the worse the merrier. Right? :)